Posts Tagged With: hurt

The three W’s

My life right now feels disordered. I have went back and forth trying to get a grip on life around me. I feel that because I feel a bit lost that Satan is using that to attack areas I am sensitive too. I have felt even in trying to help others they have lashed out at me. I know Satan is going to try what he can to get to me because he loves to take strong people when they are in weak positions to make them fall or lose hope (faith) but, I also know that God takes people when they are feeling broken and lifts them up. God tends to show up and do huge things when you think that things will not get better. I am holding on and I will lean on my loved Lord.

I do not know what the Lord has in store for me in this lifetime but, I do know what things I can be doing that would please Him and my family. That is what I need to start putting my energy into. I am going to try to put my priorities in order and simplify what I am doing and putting my mind on.  In the month of October and November it is down to business. I am going to concentrate on what I will call “The three W’s”, working, writing, and reading the word.  Working meaning at my job (get real money coming in while my husband is busy) and also working at home around the house (cleaning out) and in my art, writing meaning concentrating my thoughts into words to make sense of what is going on and what God is showing me and using my talents he gave me to get things done. Lastly, reading the word in an orderly pace for me and understanding through Holy Spirit guiding me to understand what the word is saying for my life.

Time has never been a good friend to me. I thank God everyday for getting to live another day on this earth but, it goes extremely fast and it can be hard for me to caught my breathe and keep up. I pray that that taking stock of what is going on right now and organizing what I am focused on will help me manage the sweet time God is giving me on this earth to be the best me for Him, myself and others.

041    Moving upward. copyright@Kim.Shay.2012

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Categories: spiritual/self help | Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

A daymare still haunting me

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I had a very bad dream this morning. It has haunted me all day. I am not a person who believes if you dream something it is going to happen but, yet I can not shake this dream today. I have been working very hard not to think about it.

The dream is not even rational because in it I was with a bunch of people and we were eating. The food was kind of weird. My son was walking on the side of the road and we were passing him in a car because where we were going was not that far. We were not going that fast.

I looked back to see if he was eating the food as he walked. I saw his plate fly out of his hands into the street and he ran to get it (loving food and we were so hungry) and a I saw his body go up in the air like a car hit him but, I could not see if that was what exactly happened. I started screaming oh my God over and over. I yelled for them to pull over. I got out and with my cousin I began walking back fast to get to where he was. It seemed to take forever. I saw him and he was crying and face and head and other parts of his body was bloody and swollen. He told me in his little kid voice that “A car hit me”. (in the dream he was very young like kindergarden or 1 or 2nd grade.) I asked where was the car? He told me across the street that the man was washing it off in the car wash. I was angry at what happened and that my family or whoever they were in the cars I was with did not rush with their car to him sooner and that no one had called an ambulance or taken him to the hospital. I felt guilty and sick that I let him walk alone.

This was all the dream was but, it was enough to have hurt me inside deeply for just a dream. I keep seeing my son hurt face and his little boy voice sounding confused that someone would hurt him and saying a car hit me and the sicking feeling that somehow I caused that pain and confusion for him.

I am not trying to be negative and depress people. I think instead I am saying I feel deeply for anyone who has had a child of their hurt or worse. I could not imagine your pain. For those who have not experienced that hug your children today and be grateful for them and be glad they are well. Make peace.

I am hoping by writing it will help take the painful feelings of this dream away and instead it will help someone pull their kids a little tighter and love a little harder and thank God they are alive and well. I pray and send love out to those who can not.

Categories: Marriage/Relationships | Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Brown fitting color after all

I did not like that I had picked brown for my series of photos for January. It did not seem like a pleasant color to start out the year with but, I have been pleasantly surprised that I have found some photos I am pretty happy with from the color brown. It is cozy not just bare trees. It is nature not just dirt. It is homey not just the cabinets. I found I had to reach a little farther than to just find brown tones that were easy to me. I have been sick and also taking care of my daughter who recently broke her leg ice skating New Years Eve so I have not had much time to do photos but, I am working it in as well as, my writing. My Roman got me a laptop for christmas so that is helping with the writing also.

Here is a recent photo I took in my brown series. Please respect the copyright.2014.Kim.Shay

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Categories: Art | Tags: , , , , , , ,

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